Japan (Koka): Busride - Living Life With No Regrets

The King of Salem has many faces and many forms. Yesterday, he took on the form of a 60 year old gentleman working here in my office as temporary staff until the end of this month. I figured out it was him as we rode the bus ride to our office farewell party in Mie.

"So Yamato-kun, what are you doing after this? You headed home?," he asked from the seat behind me, his voice loud and friendly in a stereotypical Kansaijin kind of way.

"Well," I replied, reluctantly pulling my eyes away from the beautiful sunset in the western sky, "...eventually. But first, I'm going on a long trip."

Our bus pulled out of the parking lot of the Board of Education and onto the road. I continued, "I'm gonna head down to Southeast Asia for awhile, then head over to India, hopefully do some volunteer work and..."

"Ooooh. Trip around the world, eh?," interrupted the gentleman, a smile on his face.

"Well, actually, just Asia this time around," I responded.

"Come on, why limit yourself?" chided the gentleman, "You could volunteer your way around the world. People do it all the time...even lots of Japanese people do it," he said.

For some reason, I got the feeling he was making fun of me. But he continued on, telling me about how I should see as much of the world as possible. And as he continued, I began to realize he was being serious. In the west, clear warm reds were fading into the blues of nightfall.

"You're young. You're healthy. You're single. You don't need to worry about taking care of anyone but yourself yet. You'll never have a chance like this again your life."

I nodded, recalling a number of occassions over the previous few months in which people (especially in their late 40's and above) had told me basically the same thing.

The gentleman continued, his face growing serious, "There will always be people around you to push their expectations on you of how they think you should live your life," said the older gentleman, "But in the end, only you know what it is that you really want to do. The final decision as to what you do is yours and yours alone. Live your dreams. Not somebody else's."

By now the bus was beginning to wind its way into the deep green of the mountains at dusk. There were no other conversations on the bus. Everybody was listening to the gentleman.

"This is not to say that you can just go off and completely disregard the needs of others around you. You need to find balance between caring for those around you and pursuing your dreams," said the gentleman as he brought his hands together to form what looked like a time-out sign knocked on its side, "You know this, right, the Chinese character for hito (person)? This stroke cannot stand without the other, right? We are the same. We stand with the support of others...and in turn, we support others so that they can stand. That is what it is to be human. You can never forget this. Live your life for your dreams, but never forget this," said the gentleman, looking straight into my eyes.

Then his expression softened and he laughed.

"Maa, this is all coming from an old guy who's never been out of the country so you can make of this what you please... But I'm telling you this based on the 60 years of life I've lived so far. Make no mistake; life is filled with hardships and there are many times when things don't go as you plan... But in the end, you are going to regret the things that you didn't do far more than the things that you tried that didn't go well. As the old saying goes, 'Shippai wa seikou no moto (Failure is but a stepping stone to success).'"

The gentleman paused for a few moments and the bus bumped along in silence. Looking outside at the passing trees, I visualized my life in the form of the hito character, propped up and made possible by the caring and generosity of so many people. I felt profoundly grateful. And then I visualized my future stretching out before me, a vast landscape of possibility.